Ten Zen things to save your marriage (or any other form of long-term relationship)

Zen is not magic,so I am not about to tell you that you have all the power when it comes to your relationship. Even when you are in total peace with yourself or have accepted full responsibility for your baggage, your partner may remain at total war with himself or continue to blame and batter you for his baggage. Some marriages can only be saved with 100 Zen things; some with 1,000; and some cannot be saved at all. However, a lot of marriages can be saved with initiating ridiculously few and easy changes. Zen is noticing the flow of life, which can be quite magical. As a Zen psychologist, I look at any particular aspect of us – any experience, action, characteristic, or event- –as connected to all other aspects inside and outside of ourselves. Everything belongs to an interconnected whole that many refer to as the constantly changing stream of life. When we start ripples on our side of the embankment, they may just reach the other side, softly and without too much effort. Psychologically speaking this means that changing but a few areas of our inner lives and our behaviors can trigger a great chain reaction that may touch our life partner deeply. So we don’t have to change every neurotic or unhealthy little aspect of ourselves to make a profound difference in our marriage. First, let’s focus on undoing some damaging behavior and reduce the discomfort we or our partner experiences as of now. For more suggestions and the science behind it, please refer to my book www.AUnifiedTheoryofHappiness.com. Five Zen things to not do.... To read the whole BLOG that I origically wrote for Psychology Today, http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/unified-theory-happiness/201210/ten-zen-things-save-your-marriage. Please go to

Honest Happiness

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/unified-theory-happiness/201209/the-how-honest-happiness Please go to Psychology Today and check out my newest BLOG. I find it so important to be grounded in reality when it comes to happiness. Isn't reality the way it is, with all its good and bad, enough? Do we really need fantasy? Empty promises? When we are aware, we see life as it is. That will suffice.

Radio Event in Seattle and Internet Radio

* A UNIFIED THEORY OF HAPPINESS * with Andrea Polard ConsciousSHIFT! > http://ht.ly/e5QGp How to blend the best of both Western & Eastern modes of consciousness for full-life participation & wholeness! * LIVE WED., 10/3! 2pm Pacific! > ht tp://ht.ly/e5QGp Catch the Global #ConsciousSHIFT Show as Andrea Polard joins Host Julie Ann Turner for a thought-provoking dialogue (just crossed 125K+ global subscribers - celebrating with all fellow ConsciousSHIFT-ers! Thanks!) Join us for ConsciousSHIFT >>> http://ht.ly/e5QGp * Discover how combining the can-do drive to achieve with the simple presence of mindful awareness can enable a balanced happiness to take flight ... We'd LOVE for you to join us! (& Help us spread the word! ;-D)

Can You Afford Compassion?

I invite you to visit psychologytoday.com and search for Andrea Polard to read my first BLOG about happiness and compassion there. I have to say I understand now more than ever how it is most rewarding to talk about love, compassion, or lovingkindness. It feels as though it is the most relevant issue of our lives. The tranquil mind is the soil in which lies the seed of compassion. Our attention is the water. Our practice is watering so that the seed can grow. It is never the wrong time to practice compassion as long as we understand it encompasses ourselves. Too many women believe in abdicating self-interest. We are all part of the ONE. No one left out. Let's keep watering our garden. http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/unified-theory-happiness/201208/can-you-afford-compassion With heart, Andrea

Free Retreat and Open House Event

Los Angeles Center for Zen Psychology Author of A Unified Theory of Happiness: An East-Meets-West Approach to Fully Loving Your Life Dr. Andrea F. Polard 881 Alma Real Dr. #305 B Pacific Palisades, CA 90272 www.andreapolard.com You are cordially invited to come to a free retreat and open house event Saturday, August 11, 2012. After the book signing and give-aways, I'd like to give people a taste of Zen, and the Los Angeles Center for Zen Psychology in general. It is an obligation-free event. You will get the space and time to connect with your true self, which is really no-self, your inner peace, your light, your tranquility. No psychotherapy, but various meditation techniques and compassion exercises are offered. You can come and leave as you please. 11:00 Engaging talk about Happiness, Book signing, inspirational give-aways (Pocket Buddhas, Bookmarks, Happiness Invitations) 12:00 Meditation 1 -- INTRO, SOUND, MUSIC, MOVEMENT 1: 00 PM Mindfulness Hour -- TEA CEREMONY, COMPASSION EXERCISES, WIDENING OF CONSCIOUSNESS EXERCISE 2 :00 PM Meditation 2 -- ZAZEN AND DISCUSSION After each segment, there is time to ask questions and relax. You can come for the whole time or choose a segment. You are welcome to bring a cushion. Please RSVP 310-455-0928 so I can prepare refreshments. With heart, Andrea